Brain surgery part II

For the 2 of you that followed the first piece, and for the others that will eventually find this when diagnosed with a rathke's cleft cyst, remember that my surgery experience wasn't all that normal.  Most people have their 'minimally invasive' brain surgery and heal wonderfully within a couple of weeks, regaining a normal sense of self within about 6-8 months.

My extremely talented neuro-surgeon and his team of anesthesiologists, interns, and other specialists that monitored me during my surgery were wonderful.  The nurses were great, and the whole Neuro Intensive Care Unit was amazing.  Even funny.  After prepping me, they wheeled me off to do a trans-sphenodial surgery, basically meaning that they punch through my sphenoid bone right behind my nose and between my eyes, and access the cyst that way.  It is incredible that they can even do brain surgery with a little scope and a few instruments up your nose.

As is pretty common, my dural sack (the sack surrounding the brain) was perforated during surgery, which meant that CSF (cerebral spinal fluid) was leaking, and had to be stopped.  So they cut a bit of fat out from my belly button area and plugged the leak with it.  I know, disgusting, but the body accepts it's own tissue so much more readily.  And I couldn't stand the funky smell until after it healed up, but it was what it was.

Anxiety doesn't win today

I woke up this morning at the  terrible hour of 5am.  The crazy thing was, that my husband was already up and at em' going to work early, and invigorated by the fresh start.  It's funny how some people are so energized by the early morning hours.  I'm not one of those people.

So why 5 am?  Because my anxiety was kicking in, threatening to ruin my sleep for the day.  I did a few mental exercises and drifted off to sleep for another 40 minutes of sweet light sleep.

And then the adrenaline began.  For me it begins at the base of my neck and spreads down my whole back.  At this point, I knew it was get up or get worse, so I got up.

I tried to find a Yoga video on  Netflix  I could do before the kids had to wake up.  No luck.  Not even a Pilates  or any kind of exercise video to be found.  So I turned on Pandora and did my own exercise  in my room.  Hmm.  After 10 minutes I felt worse, though at least my heart rate was up because of movement, not just adrenaline.  I knelt down and said a prayer for some help with this as I could see it wasn't going away easily.

At this point I was starting to feel like I was going to pass out and laid down.  I knew what was happening.  Classic anxiety for me.

So I decided that my body may be on high alert, ready for all sorts of crashes and trouble, but my mind was not going to join in on the fun.  I put all sorts of ideas about health emergencies and worsening situations out of my head and focused on the tangible.  I took our dog outside, and enjoyed the cool air for about 30 seconds, after which I made a mad dash to the bathroom and threw up.

Delusions of Grandeur

I've been pretty occupied as of late.  If not by all of the canning (peaches, pears, apricots, plum jams, raspberry jams, and even more, all fruit given to us by different friends -we're so thankful for that!) then by the PTA and craft projects and doing things for church.  Don't get me wrong, I'm not complaining - I'd rather be crazy busy than without things to do.  But somehow in the mix of it all, I've not seen a headlong problem that was staring me in the face.

That problem is my tendency to get worked up and angry and yell at my kids.  And once they've not heard me, or ignored me or been disrespectful until the 'last straw', I stay that way all the day long.  I wish I could say that my anger was fleeting, or harmless in the long run.  But the truth is they're good kids, and we're seeing signs in them that say they're acting out and suffering because of it. (stab in the heart)

I'm learning that my anger is never because of them.  It's because of me and my own failure to reign my feelings in.  What's more, I'm learning is that anger is a secondary emotion, meaning that there is another, more deeply rooted emotion under the surface of my anger that is the real thing I'm worried/upset about.  That is so very true when I think of what I do.  It's usually the thought that my kid is going to grow up to be disrespectful, rebellious, and messed up that gets me firing and demanding obedience.

I'm finding there are better ways to teach and to support good decisions.  And anger is contrary to almost all progress in those arenas.

Silhouette Bundle Sale cheapest ever!

If you had a chance to check out the post 6 years of crafting with the Silhouette you've probably seen the amazingness that you can make with this little machine.

Right now amazon has this machine with a bundle (you choose which one you want) for 229.00!

I paid much more for that, without all the free gifts.  I hope that if you are looking into buying one, you get it at the deal price!  Plus, you get a month free membership to the online shape store!
Here's the link: Silhouette Cameo with bundle of your choice

Good luck, and thanks for using my link to buy if you do!

Brain tumors, Cysts and the Diagnosis: Part 1 if my brain surgery story

I know of a lady who named her various brain tumors after her ex-husbands.  I wasn't quite as good natured as she to do that much (and I don't have any ex's) but I think it was to her credit that she did.

It's crazy hard to be told that you have a brain tumor.  So many of you already know parts of my story, but I am finally doing what I told myself I would do in those rough weeks of recovery: write about it so that another person, who may be caught in a scary diagnosis would have an idea of what happens.  And also to thank all of you.  My friends and church members doctors, and especially family, who supported me and helped me through it all.

At the time of my diagnosis, I was a content mother of 3, rolling along happily married to my best friend (still the case), trying to not go crazy having my hands so full.  All of our energies were going into raising kids who could grow up in a healthy 2 parent household that actually loves being together.  That has always been our goal.  Though not easy, neither me or my husband saw what was coming with the whole tumor thing.

Reversible Halloween and Christmas banner tutorial

This post was originally written for a guest appearance (doesn't that sound fancy?) over at thejoyfulorganizer.com   This site is an incredible place to find direction when you're up to your eyeballs in clutter.  Look for it on Oct 09!

Reversible Holiday Banner

Dress your mantle with a Boo banner for Halloween, and then flip it to celebrate Christmas!  This makes a darling gift. And it's super cheap!  Get yourself ready for crafty goodness.

Read on to make this banner:

Finding a lost family

Genealogy is a big deal these days.  People all over are beginning to learn how to find relatives from generations before them.  I get wanting to connect to the people who made you who you are, and I would love to know the generations and their stories and roots.  But I guess I've never wanted to do anything about it. Neither do I have time.

That all changed the other day.

Guest post: The Joyful Organizer

I'm so pleased to introduce Bonnie Dewkett, from thejoyfulorgnaizer.com  She is a brilliant certified professional organizer who has great ideas for organizing your craft space.  Enjoy and then visit her site to learn more about what she can do for you and your home.

Just about everyone does one craft or another.  Knitting, scrapbooking, card making… What’s the one thing they all have in common?  They can easily take over our living space with their various tools, supplies, and materials.  Keeping your craft supplies in order not only helps maintain your sanity and the appearance of your home, it also helps keep your materials in good working order.  In addition, it allows you to sit down and complete a project without having to dig out first.  The best part is getting your craft area organized doesn’t have to take a lot of time or money.

 Keep reading for some quick and easy tips and tricks to help you maintain order wherever you complete your craft projects.

Why less than perfect is happiness

Yesterday we ate lunch outside.  As as soon as my boys and their cousin were done eating, they decided to go on a hunt to find the most beautiful flower for me.  They began to bring all sorts of beauties to me.

Their sweetness moved me so I took a photo.  I love small things like this.

But what happened next was even better.  Our baby, who is only one, looked at what was going on and disappeared.  After a while, when I already had a great boquet, he brought me this one:

He had tried several times to pick it, but each time the petal ripped off instead.  Finally he figured out how to get it off the stem and was so delighted to bring me a gift.  His smile was probably bigger than mine.

Help a Momma Out Series

This is the beginning post of a series called "Help a Momma Out" where some of the most challenging parts of motherhood are addressed.  Guest posts from mommas who know will be included, and although regular posts and crafts will be interspersed, this series will go on for a couple of months.

HMO (Help a Momma Out) # 1: Why is this so hard?  Adjusting to a new baby

As a mom of four, I have struggled often enough , and yet I clearly remember the upheaval that was adjusting to baby number one.

Not all moms deal with that.  Some of my friends say their first was by no means the hardest transition, and that they kinda sailed through.  Did they have newborn siblings growing up?  Maybe their personalities are such that not much ruffles them.  I have no idea.

What I do know is, at one point or another, most of us have to deal with giving up our spot as numero uno to a baby.  That's not easy.

6 years of crafting with the Silhouette

update: Amazon has the Silhouette machine for CHEAP right now!  And it comes with a bundle.  Follow this link to  check it out: Silhouette Cameo Starter Kit Bundle 

First things first: I write this for a friend who texted asking about the silhouette machine I used to make her son's banner. No one paid me to make this post.

I tried to email a few pics to her that show what this brilliant baby can do.  It crashed my email app.
I realized that sharing these pics with you would probably inspire great creations too!

Funniest picture ever

I was just browsing through my fourth of July photos, and found this beauty.  It's pure goodness.

Cotton candy on a tooth never looked so good.  Haahaaahaa!  I love you honey!

Like father, like son.  Such a good day!

Ups and Downs

I have an inspirational post in the works, but until that comes together I just thought I'd make you feel a little better about how your day may be going.

(This spider is harmless, but it's a better site than the bite on my girl's leg)

Two days ago my girl was bitten by a spider or other bug in the garden.  She has some kinda sensitive reaction to all bites, but this summer they keep getting worse and worse until I've given all the benadryl and ibuprofen that I can, and the reaction keeps spreading down her leg.  So we landed in the doc.'s office and she has a prescription for an antibiotic, which really seems to be helping.  That's a complete relief because it means she doesn't have mersa or cellulitis, but rather staph or strep or a simple infection. Poor girl.


Then last night we invited a friend over for dinner.  I turned the oven on and it quickly went crazy hot and the element turned white, like burning and began to drip. THE METAL DRIPPED!

DIY Screen Printing

I have never screen printed before this project, but with the low cost and great results, I would do this again and again.  Sheesh, I did do this again and again.  Here's how:

Relief Society free Printable

I made this for my sweet sis in law who is teaching a lesson today in the women's class in our Church meetings.  It's called Relief Society, and it's the largest organization in the world for women.  All the lessons are taught by regular ladies who put a lot of prayer and study into their assigned topics.

 I love being there, because I'm surrounded by other women of all ages who are trying to live lives faithful to Jesus Christ and his teachings.  It's no simple task when what's popular is to follow your own way, and focus on yourself instead of serving others and putting your family above your personal interests/gain.  (which I certainly struggle to do, even when I try hard!)

Here is a little printable that hopefully inspires you to keep on in your own efforts to keep your faith:

DIY screen printing kit!

If you haven't visited instructables.com you'd better take yourself over there, because I learned how to DIY a screen printing kit from them and made it for free!!  Woo HOo!

Here's how I did it:

Grab an old canvas.  I got mine from a dear cousin that is an artist, but didn't like her painting.  Rip it apart (we just want the frame here).

4th of July Lei and Super Hero t-shirts

Craftastic no. 2 - Patriotic t-shirts
Every 4th of July (Independence Day) we make unique patriotic T-Shirts.  This year we came up with some really great boy and girl shirts (and an OK adult tee as well).

First the Lei tee:

My daughter and I love the Flag, so we used three cheap lei's from the local party store to make a flower flagged tee.  She absolutely loved it, and I loved that there were no hard fast rules about where to sew them down!

Craftastic no. 1 Frozen Elsa and Ana Crowns

So after that little drumroll about needing to take crafts to a new level, I made several crafts, this one being the first of the group.  Sorry about just now putting them up here :)

Every child on American soil pretty much knows the lyrics to "Let if Go".  Because that is the case, most little girls want Elsa or Frozen birthday parties.  So I designed htese little giftiesfor my sister's Etsy Shop (previously my own).  You can find these babies for sale in that shop www.coupleofbubles.etsy.com

Young Women Freebie Printables

My beautiful friend Brooke designed these babies for girls in our church group.  As members of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints, every year the young women in our ward go camping for a week, focusing on increasing spirituality and drawing closer to God.  As part of that, their amazing leaders (a volunteer job that about 10 ladies are asked to do) spend months preparing activities and small gifties to inspire and be applicable to the gals who go.

We are lucky enough to have a graphic design genius in our ward (or group of neighbors that all go to church in the same building).  These are her talented freebies, which she shared with me to post for you!

These printouts focus on Faith, divine nature, individual worth, choice and accountability, integrity, virtue and knowledge and good works.  I'm pretty sure that this year's theme was 'weather any storm'. The first one is meant to go along with a glow stick.

Thanks Brooke!

Avoiding the Anxiety Sucker Punch

First, some background: I have struggled with anxiety since 2011, when I underwent brain surgery and had a really difficult time healing.  The process was long and I found my anxiety impeded my ability to gauge what was real and what was not (health wise).  It's a very tricky thing, anxiety.  It consumes your ability to evaluate your sense of self, and it can be emotionally rending.

I sought help and found it (thankfully - life became overwhelmingly hard with anxiety).  I found a wonderful counselor that helped me to re-think anxiety and taught me how to cope.  I saw my doctor, who helped me with medications and directed me towards many of the suggestions I include below.  I was open about how I struggled - with my husband and other family members who loved me regardless.  I learned to depend upon God in ways I never had before, and He helped me in tangible ways.

With all that help, I'm much healthier and happier now.  I still struggle with anxiety, but on the whole am as happy as ever.  It does get better with time and effort.

Avoiding the Anxiety Sucker Punch